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The O’Donnell magic: America’s biggest loser gets a book contract

December 3, 2010

I just got a book contract!

Okay, so maybe Christine O’Donnell was a witch after all.  She didn’t have the mojo to win the Senate race in Delaware, despite a national Tea Party wave, yet she’s somehow glamored a major publisher into signing her to a book deal.

This despite the well-known fact that political memoirs, even of successful sitting politicians, are always a gamble for publishers, according to a story by Publishers Weekly.

PW reports that even conservative publishers say books about the Tea Party movement are a better bet than books by Tea Party politicos.

“We’ve gotten many proposals from politicians who didn’t win,” said Marji Ross, president and publisher of the conservative house Regnery. “But as difficult as it is [to publish a book by] a sitting politician, it’s doubly hard to do so for someone who lost.”

Yes, plenty of political figures from the Right have successful books, including Sarah Palin, Glenn Beck, and Ron Paul, whose 2008 book, The Manifesto, was a surprise bestseller. And books by established political winners like Bill Clinton, Ted Kennedy and George Bush often do well.

But those are exceptions, says Ross.

“Books by politicians usually have disappointing sales,” Ross said. “The examples that immediately come to mind are exceptions to the rule.” Lesser known figures, especially losers like O’Donnell, are especially tough to sell.

And yet St. Martins Press has signed O’Donnell to a contract, with plans to publish her memoir next August.

Can anyone who remembers the last election think of O’Donnell as anything but a clown who somehow slipped under the Tea Party tent?

I mean, not only was there the risible “I’m Not a Watch” TV commercial, there was the history of personal financial chaos, the public service record composed mostly of anti-masturbation activism (!), and the public appearances that showed she either is astonishingly flat-footed before an audience, and/or has only the vaguest familiarity with the U.S. Constitution.

I for one fervently wish O’Donnell the consolations of private life, which she so richly deserves, and I feel safe in asserting that 100 percent of the nation’s Liberals share this feeling: We never want to see her face or hear that awful voice again this side of the Pearly Gates.

Go with God (or Beelzebub, if you prefer), Christine, but, pleasepleaseplease: Go.

And I can hardly think Tea Partiers harbor feelings much kindlier toward her. After all, if the Republican Party had fielded a half-way credible candidate it might well have taken the Delaware Senate seat O’Donnell lost.

So tell me, please, does anyone out there have the least curiosity about a Christine O’Donnell book? If so, be kind and tell us what the appeal could possibly be.



10 Comments leave one →
  1. Candice Simmons permalink
    December 3, 2010 11:33 am

    Tired of hearing how “conservative writers” sell more books than liberal ones. Is it because intelligence just does not sell well in this country?

    • Chauncey Mabe permalink*
      December 3, 2010 1:34 pm

      But you know why that is, right? It’s because people who buy books by conservative writers don’t buy any other books at all. People who buy books buy liberal writers buy books of all kinds

  2. December 3, 2010 1:31 pm

    Just think of all the really good writers out there who can’t get the time of day from a publisher, but this freak of nature can? God, I was hoping never to hear her name again. How depressing.

    • Chauncey Mabe permalink*
      December 3, 2010 1:35 pm

      Fear not, Duff, neither let your heart be troubled. This book will disappear like a vrigin sacrificed at a Samhain festival.

  3. Candice Simmons permalink
    December 3, 2010 4:29 pm

    I would press the “Like” button, Mr. Mabe, were there one.

    • Chauncey Mabe permalink*
      December 3, 2010 4:45 pm

      Thank you, madam.

  4. Candice Simmons permalink
    December 3, 2010 4:30 pm

    P.S. Why does that particular photo of her make me think of Bill and Monica in the Oval Office? (sniker).

    • Chauncey Mabe permalink*
      December 3, 2010 4:45 pm

      You are a naughty young lady, Mrs. Simmons.

  5. December 4, 2010 12:51 pm

    Well, at least the autobiography of a alcohol-addled walking cadaver is outselling Palin’s latest. Oh, I mean Keith Richards, not George Bush.

    • Chauncey Mabe permalink*
      December 5, 2010 6:00 pm

      Keef is the Undead. I expect him to turn up in a Twilight movie, eating Kristen Stewart and making her ugly boyfriend cry.

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